About one year ago, I injured my lower back while moving heavy furniture. It was moderately painful and I went to physical therapy for several months.
About six months later, seemingly unprovoked, I began to experience extreme pain at the site of injury. I was unable to walk standing up straight and was bent over. It was painful to sit, stand, or move even slightly. After visiting the doctor, X-Rays revealed a herniated disk in my lower back. My hips were misaligned due to the injury and muscles in my lower back would often spasm. I was on bed rest for a few weeks until the flare-up settled down.
Keeping service during these few weeks was extremely challenging. As sitting caused the most pain, remaining seated for a long time was very difficult. I sat on a thick padded cushion on top of the chair to ease the pressure. Standing up straight or even leaning over was a feat.
During these services, I came to ponder the life of Heavenly Father. I had sustained one herniated disk from moving heavy furniture just one time, and keeping service was challenging. However, our Heavenly Father lifted heavy stones for 37 long years. Father lifted these stones thousands and thousands of times, and must have had dozens of back injuries up. However, Father didn’t have the luxury of sitting on a padded seat during the service time. Instead, Father was standing up the entire time, delivering the service with all His heart. How painful it must’ve been for Father! I believe that Father’s earnest heart to deliver His love and words of the truth to His children covered all His pain.
When I tried to imagine Father’s pain, which must have been amplified significantly more than my own back injury, tears welled up in my eyes. It is impossible for a human being to endure such suffering while hiding the pain. Before, I only fathomed the pain Father was in while working in the quarry or traveling through mountains to find His children. However, even in times that should’ve been rest for Father, He still endured excruciating pains.
Although I am a sinner and deserve to suffer in this spiritual prison as a punishment and nothing more, Father and Mother even use these hardships as an opportunity to teach me about Their sacrifice, so I can be refined as a heavenly child who will no longer forget my Heavenly Parents’ love. I repent before Heavenly Father and Mother, who’ve endured great hardships and suffering up until this day because of my heavy sins. I resolve to give thanks in all circumstances as They refine and guide us through this spiritual desert to our heavenly home, where the water of life flows.