In Order to Love

Somewhere along the way, I stopped asking “why.” The more I found myself wondering, “Why are they treating me this way?” or “Why are they acting like that?” the more it seemed to hurt me. It felt as though I were reopening something that was better left buried. So whenever differences of opinion led to conflict, I would simply think, “They must have their reasons,” and let it pass. I believed that quietly enduring it was the best way to handle things. But while reading the Bible, I came to see that my way of thinking had been wrong.

To accept someone means to respond to their words and actions with generosity and understanding. Looking back, I realized that instead of trying to understand or accept others, I had simply been quick to brush things aside. Yet there is a world of difference between ignoring something and asking, “What might have made them act that way?” out of a sincere desire to understand. I could never know everything they were going through, but as I began making an effort to see things from their perspective, I gradually came to understand the meaning and intentions behind their words and actions. Before long, I even found myself caring for them more deeply, and my own heart became much more at peace.

What I had thought was accepting others as they were may actually have been a form of resignation. Only now am I beginning to understand what true patience is: seeing others with love, trying to understand them, and accepting them with a generous heart. From now on, I want to be more attentive to the hearts of my brothers and sisters, understand them more deeply, and make a greater effort to accept them, so that I may share the perfect love that brings joy to God.